lunarobverse:

A brilliant metaphor

meanplastic:

I THOUGH THIS WAS LANA DEL REY FOR 3.40000 SECONDS

meanplastic:

I THOUGH THIS WAS LANA DEL REY FOR 3.40000 SECONDS

roughprince:

I like how genuinely terrifying this show can be.

slutdropped:

Not being able to kiss someone you really rEALLY REALLY wanna kiss is kinda sad and very dumb.

virginsacrificer:

mom: dinners ready

me:

image

girly-fanatic:

reichenbackdatassup:

wow my brother was telling me this joke and he said

"if you’re fighting with a woman and she pulls a knife on you, just pull out the bread and cheese and meat and her womanly instincts will kick in and she’ll just make you a sandwich"

then all of a sudden our mom emerges from the kitchen holding a huge ass knife and she approaches my brother asking “sorry what was that?” and he started screaming

100000000 points to mom.

codeinewarrior:

me: hey can i have some money?

bank teller: do you have an account with us?

me: nah i just heard yall got money

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